Yes, I have an escape route. From my front door, it's a 3.5 mile loop around Lake Nokomis. Yes, my escape route is a loop, therefore, I do end up back at my front door. There's almost always mayhem when I leave and undoubtedly mayhem when I return.
The mayhem is a blessed package of four children including an eleven-year-old daughter, two-year-old twin sons, and a 14-month-old daughter. Of course, the mayhem does not always start and stop with the twins, however, for now they are the center of mayhem in my family. I believe they secretly plot each morning before I open their bedroom door which show it's going to be, the circus or the zoo. So, that makes me either the ringmaster or the zoo keeper. Being mom is saved for 3:30 am nights when twin 2 can't sleep and just wants to kiss me for 2 hours.
There are days like today when I need to take the show on the road. I just can't contain the combustible energy within my home. Today included a trip to Target and a trip through the city. We're on day 5 of Operation No Pacifier also meaning day 5 without regular two-year-old naps. Mayhem has reached epic proportions. By the way, Operation No Pacifier resulted from a pacifier throwing fit of anger in the woods along the Mississippi River exactly 5 days ago.
In Target today, a woman who looked to be in her 50's stopped upon my spectacle of a zoo, gasped and said, "Oh my God! Twins? Boys? Good luck with that if you can survive." I've heard that way too many times for it to be clever. It's also not the most "Minnesota Nice" thing I've ever heard. Obviously, she wasn't a twin nor was she a mother, aunt, or grandmother of twins. Who knows where she received her expertise. Her comment made me feel like the zoo keeper trying to get control of the screaming monkey exhibit.
On days like this, there is a voice laced with kindness and grace within begging me not to check out. This mental voice speaks softly with a gentle countdown of hours, minutes, and seconds left until I get to hand-off the mayhem to my husband like a baton. Folks may believe I'm incredibly calm, but I promise it's really the voice of grace keeping me from becoming mother monkey.
As the mayhem grows with the day and the countdown shrinks, I'm obsessed with craving a mayhem vacuum. I absolutely must have that run where all mayhem subsides and is suspended like it's frozen just for my sake. Running doesn't mean that the mayhem goes away. In fact, when I return to it, it's livelier than ever. It's just that I get to push the pause button on myself. It's even more than the simpleness of relaxing since there are countless other things that are relaxing activities. Running is my mayhem escape.
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